Sweet Petey, My heart is breaking for you after reading your latest post. I can tell you are at a low point and almost ready to throw in the towel. I understand your feeling of disgust and that you feel beaten down. I don't know why anyone would make fake donations. You have to get that out of your head and move on. You have to be strong for your family and this negativity they have caused to stir inside of you can only bring a disastrous outcome. If I were you, I would push the voided donations out of my head and pretend that they were never made. I know that will be hard to do but I also know the devil (the bastard that he is) is jumping up and down right now! We all know he is doing everything he can do to bring you down further than you already are. Please do not let him do that to you. If you continue to let him manipulate you and your situation you are giving him complete control. Once you get to that point it is so hard to come back up. It will be more than difficult to find the good in any situation. The Lord is control! Don't forget that. If you have never read the book of Job I highly recommend it. Job lost his family, his servants, his crops, his animals and his health and God let the devil do this to him. The whole reason this was allowed to happen was because satan told the Lord that the only reason Job was a faithful follower was because he had everything and more and that if it was taken away from him the outcome would be his lost faith. So God let the devil do as he wanted but during and in the end his faith never faltered. The devil was shocked by this and after everything Job had endured he was rewarded with even more than he had ever thought about having. The devil lost. He lost because Job did not let him win. You can not let the devil and all his cruel tricks do this to you. Stay strong in your faith. The Lord does have a plan for you. Look at all the donations you have received so far. Yes, it is not the amount you were hoping for but it is much more than you would have received without the donation site. Do not concentrate on the donations that didn't go through, instead focus all your energy on the positives. You have family and friends that love you and will do anything to help you. Please just stay positive my friend. I do not know what is in store for you but I do know if it means having to move elsewhere (like I did) than it has to be a good thing, even if it doesn't feel like it. At our house we lost, my son was teased, beaten up and always in trouble at school. I wanted to move for years but we were buying our house and it seemed to difficult to relocate. Now my son loves school!!! He is popular and on the basketball team, etc. So God made the decision for me and I am grateful everyday when I see that beautiful smile on my son's face. Basically, what I am saying is we don't always get what we want or thank we need. God knows us inside and out. Whatever he has in store for us can only be better in the long run. Please keep your head up and turn all that bad feelings toward the people who made (and may try again) counterfeit deposits into appreciation and happiness for the people who have genuinely helped. I will continue to pray and I will send my donation today or tomorrow. God bless you and your family. Sorry for the huge paragraph...I just got to typing and didn't stop till the end.
